b r o k e n

The "inspiration" for this blog came from a song.  I can't sing, but I love music and sometimes a song comes along that "speaks" to me and "Broken Into Beautiful" (click on the name to listen) by Gwen Smith is one of those songs!  The beginning two lines gave me the idea for the "{in}side out theme because what's on the {in}side is what really matters!  We can wear a mask and pretend all we want, but when we are suddenly jarred, what is on the {in}side will spill out, no matter how pretty our {out}side looks.  This song speaks beautifully to what God thinks of us, and that should help as we empty ourselves of us and let ourselves be filled with Him.  No matter what we feel or are made to feel, He sees us as "valued, priceless and adored"!  I'm going to break it down into a couple of posts because just one won't do it justice, so let's get started . . . (actual song lyrics in italics)

"She's smiling on the outside"

Of course she {me} is!  That's what is expected.  Good Christian girls should be smiling.  They trust in God, so even when things go wrong, terribly wrong, they can still smile because they have the "joy of the Lord", right?

"But she's hurting on the inside"

She {me} is?  We all have them.  Those deeply buried hurts.  The ones we try so hard to "stuff".  The ones we don't want to show because someone might think we are weak, or a "bad" Christian {wayward children, unfaithful spouses, hidden addictions, fractured relationships, financial difficulties, health problems, anger issues, unfulfilled longings, divorce, death, grief . . . and the list goes on}.  Hurts that only God can heal, but we try to hide them, even from Him.

"It's getting hard just living anymore"

Depression, anxiety, fear . . . they are all real emotions to real Christians, and some days, just "living" is a battle.  Crawling back in bed and pulling the covers up over your head would be so much easier.  But then, you wake up and the problems are still there.  The brokenness has not magically disappeared.

"And the shadows she has clung to"

We sometimes cling to the brokenness not because we like it, but because of its familiarity.  Or, so we don't forget.  Or because we are stubborn.  Or because someone might think we are weak if we reveal our shadows. But then, we never move on.  We are stuck in that place of brokenness.  Satan has us parked there, and we just can't seem to believe the Truth.  We just can't break free and let the Son shine in and chase away the shadows, can't believe that we are beautiful to Him.

"Painful things that she has been through"

Burying a spouse (or a parent, or a grandparent or a child or a sibling . . . ) {painful}.    A wayward child {painful}.  

Divorce {painful}.  

Marital infidelity {painful}.  

Addiction {painful}.  

Health problems {painful}.  

Financial difficulties {painful}. 

Fractured relationships {painful}.

Painful. Painful. Painful.

God knew we would have {painful}, in John 16:33 it says, "...in the world you will have tribulation {pain}. But take heart, I have overcome the world."   It does not say "some people".  It says YOU.  It does not say you "might" have.  It says you WILL.   Dictionary.com defines tribulation as: grievous trouble; severe trial or suffering.  He knew, God knew the painful things we would go through.

"Have left her feeling worthless, Lord"

When we "stuff" those feelings, those hurts, that pain, that tribulation, we don't let God be the "overcomer".  We allow Satan to convince us that we are worthless.  And when he knows that is our weakness, he will do all that he can, in his power to keep us there.  He will keep us in the shadows, clinging to them, clinging to the painful things that haunt us.  He will do his best to convince us that we are worthless, guilty, hungry, empty.  He will fill us with the lie that we don't matter . . . 

"You change worthless into precious.

Guilty to forgiven.

Hungry into satisfied.

Empty into full.

All the lies are shattered.

And we believe we matter.

When you change broken into beautiful!"

That's the first verse and chorus!  Won't you let Him change you today? I need to pray to let Him do this each day.  I need to let His spirit flow through me, reminding me that I'm precious, forgiven, that only He will satisfy and fill me.  I have to let Him shatter Satan's lies, and I have to believe that to Him I matter so that I can let Him change my "broken into beautiful".

Then and only then, can I be filled with sweet water so that I can spill it out on others!

Reality check:

How have you spilled {or how will you spill} out God's sweetness today?